2011

2011 was another busy year, with Vesper added to the family. This was also the reason I stepped down from Children's Church ministry. However, it was also a year of milestones in terms of career achievements, and ironically, the year that I also decided that career would take a backseat.

Career
It was truly a year of career high for me. We had pushed out a couple of org-wide stuff and got a few awards for L&D and leadership development.

At the same time, my organisation nominated me for HRM Awards 2011 under Best HR Manager category. I was shortlisted among other four. Though I didn't win, it was a huge form of recognition for me to be nominated and shortlisted. I was never in HR, but handled L&D and leadership development for a couple of years. This was an affirmation of what I was doing and I am always thankful for the opportunities given to me and the trust and belief my bosses had in me.

Family vs Work

Perhaps it was slight burnout that I really thought about what I wanted at that point in time.

I always think that I'm not the sort who can stay at home full-time. Even if that happens, I already told Clem, "Keep the maid".

I don't mind doing housework. In fact, I can be quite OCD and definitely have higher standards than any maid. I proclaim that my house is cleaner when my maid goes on home leave, cos I can't a single stain, a stray toy and have to set them right immediately. With my maid, I close one eye cos I don't want to be too hard on her.

Why I need the maid, is because I rather spend time with kids than on housework. Also, I don't want to spend my time yelling at them to clean up the mess. I can be a monster mom that strikes terror.

However, I've been having this niggling thought about spending more time with the kids.

Then, during Grace Retreat, the speaker was talking about different forms of idolatory. We were given a pop quiz. I realised that I had career and power idolatory.

That retreat gave me a lot to think about, to reflect on my priorities, on what I want for my life.

I shared with a cell friend. She shared that I should do it for Verity. Verity is a bright girl and she has a mind of her own, even at a young tender age. If I don't catch her now, I may lose her when she grows up.

That is gem to me. As I reflected, I realised that I only gave Verity my leftover time.

Since Cavan started K2, I had been going through his work everyday, paying more attention to him. Verity would hover around, brought out her own worksheets to revise and beckon me to look at her colouring, her crafts and worksheets. I would do that when we're done with Cavan's spelling and Chinese.

Whenever, Verity wanted to do painting/ reading, I would tell her wait till Vesper is asleep as baby needs my full attention. So she would potter around, waiting patiently and grabs any time pockets to do what she wants.

By staying home, I could spend more time with her too.
At that retreat, I made a decision to focus less on building a career and explored the options. With understanding bosses and supportive colleagues, I committed to a 2/3 work arrangement for 2012.

In the News

Another high note was the family appeared in the newspapers! This was for some Green Ambassador movement by the ENV, Southwest CDC and Dairy Farm Group.

Cavan and Verity won some awards for their diligence in helping to save the environment and the media wanted to feature a family. We did English interviews and a Chinese one for the TV news. Eventually, we appeared on Wanbao.

It had been an exciting year. Also one that I looked forward to end, so I could start my part-time arrangements. It has been such joy with the kids. They are growing up simply too fast!

Post-dated Posts

It's been busy, busy, busy. There are so many stuff I meant to post, but hard to find lone spurts of at least 30 min.

Here are the post-dated stuff I've been posting. Will add on till I get current.

Pri 1 Registration
Short Get-Away to Bangkok... Kids-Free!
Tokyo (21 Mar - 1 April 2010)
Roadtrip to Desaru

recess time

To Cavan, empowerment comes in a form of a school recess time.

Till primary one, he's never had money in his hands, with the freedom to buy anything he loves, without Mommy hovering over him, saying 'no' to this and that.

For his first week at school, I didn't know what to expect, so I gave him $1.50 on top of packing ham sandwiches for him.

On the first day, I watched him from a distance at the school canteen. He ate his sandwiches and drank from his water bottle. Then he got up from his seat and walked around, in fact two rounds, the school canteen. Then he queued up at the drinks stall.

He returned to his seat with one siew mai.

When he was done, he threw the waste away and disappeared into another part of the canteen, hidden from where I was standing. He didn't appear for quite some time, and I was getting restless.

Then he emerged with a bowl of noodles.

I looked at my watch and panicked. There were 5 more minutes before recess time was over.

I caught his eyes and signalled him to hurry up. By then, the teacher was making announcements and students started streaming into the school hall. I was relieved when he managed to finish his bowl of noodles just as the bell rang.

That evening, I asked whether he was hungry. Why did he buy so much food and kept walking around the canteen?

His reply, "I haven't tried all the food yet!"

I was very amused by his reply. I told him that recess time is not buffet time. It's not for him to try out all the stalls.

* * * * * * * * * *

That week, he kept having noodles for recess. I was getting concerned that he was overeating. Just one week into school he was gaining.

So I told him no more noodles.

One day, he proudly told me after school that he didn't buy noodles. I was pleased until he said,

"I bought rice."

Faint.

* * * * * * * * * *

He lost his scissors at school. So I decided to punish him to teach him about being responsible for his own belongings. The punishment had to correspond to the nature of the deed, so I told him that he would not get pocket money for 2 days and the money will be used to buy a new pair of scissors.

It was a heavy sentence. To him.

He broke down and cried and said how sorry he was and he would never lose his things again. I felt sorry for him but punishment had to be meted out. He had to learn consequences.

So I consoled him that we would still pack food for him to eat. He would not go hungry.

Later he found his scissors and was very very glad.

Still, I decided to take away his pocket money and discussed with him.

My explanation was that he went to school after lunch and he would have dinner after school. He won't starve. We'd pack him stuff to eat in school.

He agreed. I was relieved.

At least a step to check that weight gain.

Maybe he was not ready for that 'empowerment'. Well, perhaps gradually. He still got pocket money when he had CCA and he could eat whatever he liked.

I was ok with this. Afterall, it was only once a week.