"Spend time with me"

Vesper is vocal about what she wants and is not embarrassed to ask for it. One of the requests she makes mostly of me is to spend time with her. 

I was able to do a lot that when i wasn't working- send her to and fro school (and enjoying the chats during the journey), having lunch together, prac piano/ spelling/ 听写, reading books, going to the playground, swimming etc. 

Now that i started working, the time is divided among her and the other 2. Especially when primary school demanded more time from me, my time with Vesper lessened. 

The best I could do was to lie with her before bedtime, chit chat and tell stories. To me, i fulfilled "spending time" with her.

But to her, it wasn't. 

Her frequent grouse is that i don't soend time with her. But didn't i lie down with you, tell you stories blah blah blah. I retorted. 

Not counted, came the grumble and she would get angry with me and stopped talking to me. 

I was at a loss so i sought my counsel- clem. 

Aha, he said, u must know what spending time to her means. 

Aiyo, why this gal extra demanding. Ok ok for world peace, i will do just that. 

So i must play her fav games with her e.g. Sophia the first monopoly, code breaker etc. 

One night, i specially called out to her n said let't play code breaker together! And we had a wonderful time. 

Two days later, she got angry with me again for the same reason n i jumped to my own defence, i just played with you two nights ago! No you didn't! Yes i did!

Anyway, no guesses on who lost in the end- me. You have such a bad memory! I sulked. 

I turned to my counsel again. 

Aha, when u do spend time with her, u must tell her u r spending time with her. Then it will register. 

So troublesome this gal. 

Today, i had the whole day of being with her. Just the two of us. 

After she was done spelling and stuff, i asked if she'd like to play. And left it totally to her to decide. 

And we played most of the games she likes. 

In between, i kept asking. Is it great that mummy is spending time with you? Yes, she smiled happily. And kept coming to my side to hug me. 

I hope i've redeemed myself. And must be mindful to "spend time" with her, according to her definition. And while i do that, must reinforce that i'm doing what i'm doing. A lot of management communication principles:

First, tell people what you r going to do. 

Next, do it. 

When you r doing it, tell people yiu r doing it. 

After you have done it, tell people u did it.

Practising on my youngest key stakeholder. 

Will she remember tomorrow?