Maid Matters

I have previously blogged about choosing a maid. By the grace of God, He has provided a good maid for us. Nancy, a 36-year-old Filipina, was a transfer maid. She had only worked for a family for a month. Agency cited that the employer's ah ma didn't like her face (too fierce looking) hence returned her. Other than that, Nancy had worked for a family, taking care of 3 children from 2005-2007.

I noticed her when we were going through the biodata at the agency. She was the one who poured drinks for customers, arranged the chairs and even tended to Cavan when we talked to the staff. I casually asked about her and found out that she was a transfer maid. There had been advice not to take in a transfer maid, as there must be some reason the maid was rejected. Going against the grain, I took her. Afterall, she had served one employer for two years. Surely she couldn't be that bad.

My life was changed by her entrance. What I meant was beside having the household load off our shoulders, I found my perspective of life has also changed.

Funnily, the 1st question I asked myself was, how can we better her life? Many employers here viewed their maids as, well, maids. I saw her as a person under my custody. That I am also a steward. God had entrusted her life to us during this time she serves us. How do we take good care of her?

My parents also shared the same sentiments as me although we did not make it explicit. For my parents, who are non-Christians, their kindness towards her stemmed largely from their compassion towards those more disadvantaged. We'd usually let her eat before we do. I was glad Nancy was also taken good care of while we were at work.

There was one particular church service where we prayed for children. Usually, my first thoughts would hinge around my own kids. But at that service, I could only think of Nancy's 2 daughters (probably aged 6 & 9). I prayed for their safety and for God's providence to be upon them. And for Nancy to have a peace of mind while she works here. It must be difficult for family to be separated for such an extended period.

With her around, I found that my relationship with Clem, my parents and my in-laws improved tremendously. With Clem, I no longer needed to nag him to do this and that. We also had more time with our kids.

With my parents, we have more time to talk over dinner. In the past, my parents would be busy with washing and cleaning whenever we went for dinner. Now we can sit down and chat and chat.

Likewise for my in-laws. We have more time chatting and catching up with one another as we go over for dinner during weekends. And my father-in-law refused to let Nancy do any chores in his house when she offered to wash the dishes. He viewed her as a guest. So cute.

Indeed, I thank God for such an able helper. She was always ahead of me, without needing me to instruct her. When I noticed that it was raining and asked her to bring the clothes in, she already did. When I asked her to prepare Cavan's water bottle before going out, it was already in the bag. She observed the way I did things and the kind of preparation I had and would follow accordingly, without being told to. I was spared of the mental and emotional stress that most employers have.

This week, we would be gone for a holiday, leaving her behind with my parents. I'm usually not the sentimental sort but somehow, I feel sad leaving her here. I'm sure she would miss our kids too. As I was packing for the trip, she tried to help and I could sense her sadness about our absence.

As much as my initial refusal to regard her as family, I have no qualms to say that now, she is part of us.

Nancy carrying Verity

Reflections of a 1st-time Page Boy

Ah Gu Collin asked mummy months ago whether I could be the page boy for his wedding. Before mummy could answer, ah ma and ah gong screamed "Yes!"

My, my. The whole family was so busy on 16 Dec. Ah ma followed Ah Gu Collin playing the traditional role of an aunt to bring the suckling pig and what-nots to the bride's house in the wee hours. Ah Gu Stanley chauffeured the ah yis. Daddy and mummy were emcees for the dinner. Almost the whole family was mobilised! Only Verity had the luxury of sleeping, drinking milk and being entertained in the hustle and bustle. Not fair!

Everything went pretty well and I was happily throwing the rose petals in the floor when suddenly I heard "Pop! Pop!" I panicked. Was there a terrorist attack? No, there were the aunties popping the party poppers! I hate loud noises and began crying at the top of my voice! Grandaunt Judy panicked cos I stopped walking and thus the wedding couple could not carry on. Daddy and Mummy, on stage, were wondering why there was a delay mid-way.

Grandaunt cleverly distracted me by popping M&M's into my mouth while goading me to walk on. I managed to multi-task: crying while eating M&M's while walking while throwing rose petals on the floor. Daddy and Mummy were the most amused when they saw this scene but had to act unaffected and carry on the emceeing. I'm sure Ah Gu Collin and his bride were NOT amused.

Would I want to play this role again? I don't mind. Throwing things on the floor was fun and I don't get to do it often without being scolded. And it was great to be accompanied by a pretty gal. Just don't pop anything loud ok?

"It's so happening out there! I can only lie here and watch. Hmph!"

Mummy, can you get me a nicer suit next time? I look like a waiter here!

A last minute rehearsal with June Ah Yi guiding Jie Jie Melody and I

The dinner was taking too long to start! Daddy saved the day by feeding us cakes.

Grandaunt Judy and Grandunc Eric watched over Verity while Daddy and Mummy were on stage.

I'm stoning already

Getting ready for the act

Boy am I famished! Feasting on sharkfins soup over my rice

The yam seng was too loud!

After a night's work

Preparing for Family Trip to Taipei

We're going to Taipei, dragging along the brood and all. Well, if it's meant to be a vacation, why are we bringing along Verity? Cavan is no problem - tried and tested - fuss-free both as a travelling baby and toddler. Now, to bring 2 kids... we're really asking for it.

The reasons are simple: 1st, I'm still breastfeeding her. It sounds like less hassle to bring her along to offload the milk than to pump and pump before and during the trip. If I have to pump and store milk during the trip, then what vacation am I having? Direct feeding is easier.

2nd, her doting father decided that she should come along as well. She's now our family and if Cavan is coming on a trip with us, she should be in the family trip as well. Right. Like she's going to be permanently emotionally scarred for being left out of the family trip.

So the decision was made. We're all going during the expensive Christmas to New Year period. Clem is currently studying at Command and Staff College and he can't take leave till next year. This is the only window for a trip. At the same time, I've been so busy since I returned from maternity leave. Felt like I've done 2 months' worth of work in that one month. And I needed a break desperately. So we're paying premium to getaway.

Everything was done last minute (yea, I sort of like this kind of thrill). We're not going on a tour cos if I have to breastfeed every now and then, the programme's up by the time I finish feeding. Booked Jetstar budget flights and found that they were more expensive than normal flight. Will lose $$ if cancel. Have not been successful in getting hotels cos mostly were fully booked. Fortunately, managed to get one with much sourcing and prayers. We're not very savvy bookers and tend to do everything last minute, so always ended up spending more than needed.

Oh, and one more thing. Verity doesn't have a passport yet and Cavan needs to update his passport photo.

Other than that, we just need to pack for the trip and plan the itinerary. This is going to be twice the prep we did for last year's Korea trip. Maybe 3 times more.

All said, we're really looking forward to the adventure!

Confusion

Sometimes we adults can send such confusing messages to our kids! We, for one, are no exception.

"Don't take so long to eat your dinner. Eat quickly!"
"Don't eat so fast otherwise you'll choke!"

So Daddy/ Mummy, should I eat quickly or slowly?

"You're a big boy now, you must use the potty."
"No, you can't use the knife. You're too young!"

So Daddy/ Mummy, am I old enough or still too young?

"Huh? You woke up already? Go back to sleep!"
"Quickly, wake up! Late already!"

So Daddy/ Mummy, when should I have more sleep and when to wake up quickly?

Daddy, Mummy, I'm so confused!

6th Wedding Anniversary Dinner @ Morton's

A really good excuse for us to get out and have a nice dinner. Clem is into good steak so we thought we'd try Morton's the Steakhouse.

My thoughts kept hinging around our kids and whether there was enough milk to feed Verity back home. Guilt overcame me as I sipped the almond liquer and lychee martini. Come on, Clem goaded, just relax and enjoy our time together. Yeah, he was right, it was our time alone together.

Great to just spend the time chatting and wowing every now and then, like some suaku when the waitress did a menu presentation or brought us our food. Felt like our dating days again.

These days, even when we had our time alone together, it was usually spent speed-shopping, meal-gobbling, grocery-grabbing as we stole 1 or 2 hours away from our kids, cos I would need to go back and breastfeed.

Tonight, just let go. I've stored enough milk for the day.

Our personalised menu (our wedding date is not 23 Nov, but it was indicated as such cos we dined on that day)

Yummy onion and egg loaf. Enough to eat on its own.

Lobster bisque that tasted a bit bitter, probably bcos of the wine

Sauteed wild mushrooms which ended up looking like black fried carrot cake in the photo.

This was actually half a portion of the prime rib. Imagine how big the actual one was. We each took a half. It was cooked so nicely that I even gobbled up the fat which had a nice chewy texture.

Complimentary Morton chocolate cake with Haagen Daz ice cream and card with our photo

Our private corner

Happy 6th year of being married!

Sun Days (almost)

The weather had been so bad for the past weeks. Didn't know what got over us, but my colleagues and I set out to go suntanning on Sat.

I called to check weather forecast the night before and it forecasted showers with thunder in the late morning. I lost heart too when we saw dark clouds in the morning but Clem told me that he and Cavan prayed for great weather, so have faith!

Thank God the weather was SUNNY!

Prepared my fav picnic food- cold somen salad

All ready for the sun!

No tan, no return!

Baking in the sun **************

We weren't very great fans of nature and we wouldn't have thought of going to the Botanic Gardens. Cavan's PG had organised an outing to the Jacobs Ballas Children's Garden but unwilling to part with $12 (yes, we cheapo parents), we thought we'd go there on our own instead. Incidentally, there was a children's carnival so we joined in the crowd.

Needless to say, children need experiential activities so there were plenty to engage them.

Learning about food making process

Storytelling

Walking across the suspension bridge
Matching the parts of the fruit
Pumping water

Little gardener


No! Daddy's shoes are not plants!

Unfortunately, the good weather did not last long. Thank God we made our escape before the heavy downpour. We decided to go to Mad Jack for lunch since we'd pass by the place. It was surprisingly a nice, quiet place for a lazy afternoon. Kid-friendly too, with storybooks for kids. Staff were froendly too.

Clem had a rib-eye steak ($11.90) that was not too bad. I ordered grilled fish with cream sauce ($7.90) and the generous and juicy portions came with a huge cup of yummy mash potatoes. Cavan and Nancy (our maid) had fish and chicken baked rice ($6.90).

When our coffee came, it looked unimpressively thin but we were surprised by its good taste. I'm usually quite picky about coffee and this passed the test. However, we were quite disappointed with the banana cake and walnut cake. They were a tad too dry. We would prefer something more moist. And the banana cake had a sticky substance (maybe bananas?).

Think we'll try other desserts the next time. I'm curious about its Banana Craze and Wild Boy (Freshly made banana crumble topped w/ ice cream & caramel sauce). Hmmm... why am I going bananas over bananas?

Reading while waiting for our food

Drinking daddy's coffee using the milk tin

The food was good!

Reconsidering school

Despite 4 wonderful months of PG at Gracehouse, we considered putting Cavan elsewhere for nursery next year and subsequently, kindergarten. We wanted to put him for the morning session which unavailable at Gracehouse. Moreover, it was more convenient to go to Glory Kindergarten. So we registered him at Glory and paid the fees.

Somehow, something in me kept telling me that perhaps that was not the best decision. To be frank, Cavan has made many friends in school and he was taught well. Though I was not the one schooling there, I had this sense of attachment to the school. Perhaps it was due to the updates that Cavan provided everyday.

Through him, I know that Elyssa initially refused lunch and only ate biscuits. Through him, I know that Nathaniel and Leston played alot with him and Leston's grandfather picks him up. I know that Yi Enn is a little boy who always says "Mum mum". Ethan and Genna were new friends who joined the class recently. I also learnt that the kids learnt math by singing "Green bottles hanging on the wall" that there were Elyssa-bottle, Nathaniel-bottle, etc. and Cavan-bottle was the last one standing before he fell and there were no bottles left.

Through him, I know that Miss Jenny was the one who always asked the children to "Drink water! Drink water!" And Miss Pandian always poured biscuits for the children. I never knew his lao-shi's name till recently cos he kept telling me her name was "yu tou" (fish head).

Through him, I discovered that I had been mispronouncing the word "biscuit". I've been saying "bis-kate" but Cavan corrected me that it should be "bis-curt" instead.

Cavan was already so familiar with the place and the people. I heard that Cavan would say hi to every teacher during assembly as he entered. He would help to drive the car and cycle the bikes back to the position after dismissal.

At the Meet-the-Parents session last week, I couldn't help but feel a sense of pity that we were to say good bye. It was made more difficult when Miss Pandian looked dismayed when we broke the news to her and Xiao Yi lao shi commented that she was going to lose her best student before hugging Cavan and smooching him. Later we heard that Cavan might get into the morning session afterall.

If that was true, we might reverse our decision to transfer Cavan. At most, we'd forgo the deposit and hopefully get back the fees that we've paid at Glory. Although Cavan adapts easily, we didn't want to assume that changes don't affect him. He's been through enough changes in his life for the past 3 months.

With Miss Pandian

With Xiao Yi lao shi With Miss Jenny

Fav play area

"I'm so happy to be here!"

Bumping into best friend Jedi outside classroom

Cartoon kids

Someone recently remarked that Verity looked like Cabbage Patch kids. Yea so true! Doeful eyes, button nose, small mouth, chubby cheeks.

Many commented that Cavan looked like Jack Jack when he was a baby.

Why do our kids all resemble cartoon characters?

Return of the Working Mama

Tomorrow, I will return to the rat race. Admittedly, I've been looking forward to this day. However, as the day draws nearer, I'm beginning to have mixed feelings. Half of me wants to stay home.

Think I enjoyed this maternity leave more than the previous, though more exhausting. Reason being I had a conversation partner- Cavan. During my 1st maternity leave, there was only baby Cavan. I didn't have a decent adult conversation the whole day. Only monologue. And the replies came in "Wahhhhh!", "Eh eh eh", "Gurgle, gurgle." As you can see, I'm a social being. I need to talk!

Well, the things I'll miss when I return to work:

* enjoying private mornings with Cavan, dunking our wheat crackers in milo kosong

* hearing him yell, "Mommy, I'm home already!" as he returns from PG before letting loose on the happenings at PG

* feeling the warmth of Verity's tiny body while rocking her on my shoulder, and having her sleep on my chest

* watching Verity's satisfied face after nursing her

* seeing my 2 kids interact with each other

* watching my 2 kids asleep in the mornings and savouring every moment gazing at their serene, cherubic faces